Finding Clarity Through Tarot

Today, it’s raining very hard and my pets and I are all cooped up in the house together. These consist of our cat, Dixie, and our recently adopted dogs, Polly and Ozzie. On one hand, I feel great contentment here. On the other, however, I am feeling some sadness: spending time with the dogs means leaving the cat on her own, and vice versa. The dogs have only shared our home for two and a half weeks, so some periods of standoffishness are to be expected. However, I am so hoping for some love to develop between all of these furry babies. Perhaps it’s an optimistic outlook. Thus, today I look to the cards to provide me with a guide.

For this, I have done a four-card reading: Eight of Pentacles, Two of Wands, Seven of Cups and Two of Cups.

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Deck used: The Original Rider Waite Tarot DeckOriginal Rider Waite

The Eight of Pentacles indicates diligence, repeated effort and refining skills. This could mean a need to continue the efforts of socialisation, and refine the skill of reading my cat so as to not rush her.

The Two of Wands has appeared again, and here its meaning feels slightly different than it did previously. It’s a card of the unexpected, indicating that a choice needs to be made, and a surprise may be afoot.

It leads is to the Seven of Cups, which is another card of choice. This time, the choices abound, bombarding the querant with so many possibilities that selection may feel impossible. There is much creative potential, but a choice must be made with the heart.

Pleasingly, the ultimate card dispels any doubt of the outcome. The Two of Cups is a card of harmony and sharing. Presumably, this outcome is in our future provided that the other conditions are met.

While this reading was overall positive, I still felt a lack of clarity. This should not be seen as a fault of the deck, but rather my own lack of directness when asking the question. Thus, I decided to try again. This time, I indicated beforehand which spread I would be using: one for overcoming obstacles in four cards. Card 1 in this spread represents the situation at hand, card 2 represents the obstacle, card 3 is the appropriate course of action and card 4 is the expected outcome.

Immediately, this reading felt more applicable. Sometimes, the tarot can provide us with lots of information, but it makes little sense without a structure that must be in place from the beginning.

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The Situation card is the Eight of Swords. Though this card is quite negative, it implies that the situation is one of the querant’s own making, and her way out will become clear once she chooses to move. After all, the path out is clear to anyone viewing the situation.

The Obstacle card is the Three of Swords. It implies that a third party has entered, resulting in heartbreak and sadness. Thus, I feel that the obstacle at hand is Dixie’s way of life being invaded. Perhaps the three swords represent each of them, resulting in a drastic change in their collective way of life. And how appropriate that the background in the card should mirror the sky today.

The Action card is the Queen of Cups, which feels like very subdued action. This queen is intuitive, generous and loving. Perhaps she needs to be located, as in an animal expert or trainer, or perhaps she represents who I need to become to resolve this situation: a woman in tune with the needs of my animals. My favourite resource for all things cat-related is Jackson Galaxy; I expect it’s time to consult him on socialising cats and dogs.

Lastly, the Outcome card is the Seven of Pentacles. This card represents the benefits owed after hard work. The subject looks admiringly on as his crop grows, lush and full. His work isn’t done, as he still has his rake or hoe close to hand, but he is able to pause and acknowledge that he has done right by his harvest. Ultimately, that is all I want to be able to say about my own caregiving.

Today’s Tarot Reading: Two of Wands, Five of Coins, The Lovers

Sharing my personal tarot readings is a bit like sharing a journal entry – they can get pretty personal. The reason many of us turn to the wisdom of the tarot is to answer niggling questions about ourselves, and today’s was no different for me. As previously mentioned, I’ve had some difficulty adjusting to my new residence, and seeing my cat’s stress markers heightened made me feel all the sadder.

I’ve spent weeks daydreaming about our old flat and thinking that, if only I could get it back, I could redecorate and show my husband how perfect it was. Today, though, I’d finally had enough of my own moping. Time to turn to the tarot.

My query was, ‘Tarot please show me how to progress myself from living in the past.’ The cards I drew were: Two of Wands, Five of Coins and The Lovers.

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Deck used: Golden TarotGolden Tarot by Kat Black

With a three-card spread, I usually see this as a past-present-future journey. However, that didn’t feel like the message the cards were conveying today. In the first location, we have the Two of Wands. This indicates future planning, forward motion and understanding. There is also something regal about the man we see – though he carries a wand and globe (stating, in tiny letters, continent names), they could as easily be the orb and sceptre. This suggests that a noble path is involved, even if it only feels like putting one foot in front of the other.

The following card was (once again) Five of Coins. Having recently had this in a one-card reading, I’m not overly surprised to see it again. After all, cards can keep reappearing until the issues are fully dealt with, and the card gets to the heart of my query. My focus is still on what I lack, remembering only the elegance and simplicity of apartment-style living. Therefore, this aspect of myself, which manifests as a humbling feeling of lack, is more in my own mind than my actual state. I am living in the past rather than moving into the journey suggested by the Two of Wands.

The final card is The Lovers, which is the only Major. This indicates that the resolution is to be found outside myself, in the purity that is love itself. The Lovers is the counterpart of The Devil, which indicates that desires are often the result of temptation and misguided choices. In The Lovers, however, the couple’s union is blessed by an angel and watched over by a bird of paradise. While the couple seems a bit tentative, the card’s presence indicates that problems will be overcome by relying on one another. Moreover, loving another person can help make one more forgiving, even of one’s self. I also need to point out that there is a little dog depicted in this card, which some would say is an Italian greyhound. However, at first glance it looks like a hairless dog to me – here’s hoping that one is in my future!

In short, the reading indicates that future planning and forward motion will bridge a gap of perceived lack to reach love and contentment. Even when times feel bleak and change has rocked the metaphorical boat, there is always progress to be made, and always love to give.

Adjusting to a New Space

Change has always been a tricky thing for me to negotiate, but the last year has really pushed me out of my comfort zone. Leaving our home of six years was a sad experience for me, even if I knew that doing so would bring us more space. Living in the same flat for so long allowed us to really make our mark on the place – the walls had all been painted to suit our tastes, we’d had the kitchen redone, and even had the living room fitted with the carpet from my husband’s childhood bedroom. We put a lot of ourselves into it. It was also the home where I’d found a lot of healing, and where my true spiritual journey began.

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Salt lamps found 4 Salt Candle Tea Light Holders (Bundle)here; just starting on a new journal found Baroque Damask Journal (Diary, Notebook)here.

Thus, moving into a house where another family had clearly made their mark (quite often irreparably through the anaglypta) was a shock to the system. However, the month of December was mostly spent redecorating my office and our bedroom. Though it took a week and a half just to remove the overpowering wallpaper in the office, I was so pleased once it was gone. This was, in part, because it was making me ill – wallpaper glue is wheat based, and I am allergic to wheat. This meant a fortnight of breathing difficulty, vomiting and flailing emotions. My husband is so lucky.

Once that was finished, holes were filled in and cracks got smoothed over. Perhaps they were the reason that the previous owners put the wallpaper up in the first place. Now, the paint is a pale blush shade, and I’ve repainted the desk (a vintage pine dressing table that had seen better days) and the chaise legs (also scuffed and grubby) a glossy white, and dyed both the desk stool and chaise upholstery charcoal.IMG_0787.JPG

Thus, they now complement each other, and the Scandi cushion ties into my favourite appliqué curtains. I feel really pleased with the results, and more pleased knowing that I stuck with my old pieces of furniture to create the look I wanted. Though I was sorely tempted to go to IKEA for some new things, I must admit that what I have suits me fine. Both the chaise and desk were second hand pieces found on eBay some time ago, and I’m happy to be continuing their story.IMG_0794.JPG

All the pieces are now nestled in where they should be, and they are all little enough that a quick rearrange will make the room big enough to fit a bed should we have visitors. While the process was a tedious one, I now have a gorgeous study where I can read, write, do yoga and practice the vertical dance to my heart’s content. I even believe the cat approves. However, the most important result of the decoration process was realising that, after it was finished, I finally felt as if I belonged in the house. Perhaps after a few more improvements are made, it really will feel like home – which I feel is so important for accomplishing good work.

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Step Aside, Ego

This commitment to the path of Tarot requires that I discard the ego. This is often a solitary path, working with my intuition in quiet determination. It may be a struggle for me to remember that this journey is not about me, or my desires, or a projection of my own glamour to the outside world. This journey is about learning an old art and using the knowledge in the world around me for the highest good.

This may not be an inviting calling, but I know that it is mine. My ego still makes its presence known, however. It might manifest in an obsession for material things, or even in my desire for monetary success so that I can write a cheque to my husband for £50,000. There is even a bit of the ego in my hope to surprise him with money.

Thus, I need to recognise that there is no room for my ego on this path. Instead, I need to learn to follow my inner guidance so that my actions might best serve the world – to heal it, if only a little. For a Leo, this humble path may prove to be a great challenge , but perhaps that is the point – to make the commitment in spite of an inflated, boasting and fearful ego.

After all, this is not about me. This knowledge may choose to flow through me for the good of All, but any healing provided is not about me.

Therefore, I ask that my work here and out in the world be done for the highest good – the Earth’s and those around me – and may I know the call to service when it sounds.

The Art of Surrender

Yesterday, I put up a few things for auction on eBay to try to bolster my finances. I realised today, however, that I am still operating from a mindset of lack. So panicked am I about acquiring new things with the funds raised from the old that I check my sales an inordinate number of times every day. It’s crazy. Though I thought I was moving away from that mindset in the act of selling things I once loved, I’m still chasing the perfect       .

And so today I turn to Spirit to request a miracle. Please release me from me feelings of lack so that I might see my abundant disposition for what it truly is. All that I need, I have.

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Today, I started reading Wayne Dyer’s There%20Is a Spiritual Solution to Every ProblemThere is a Spiritual Solution to Every Problem, and it got me thinking about how desperately I try to control every situation I am in. I don’t even consider myself to be a control freak, but I do find myself often obsessed with outcomes, trying to mentally sway the universe’s workings in my favour. I should know by now that the universe does not work that way. Instead, it responds best to the balancing act of detachment from the outcome paired with the vibrational energy of love. Settling into this state is something that I find tricky. The release has found me a couple of times, but I’ve had some difficulty calling it to me. Or, rather, sinking into it.

In his book, Dyer refers to this as surrender – turning the problem over to Spirit for it to be solved on our behalf. Furthermore, this surrender is necessary for the best outcome to reach us. Tension around an event and that ‘refresh energy’ (that abysmal disposition in which one refreshes one’s inbox, feed or browser) sabotages our efforts, sending the wrong message to the universe.

And so I would like to reflect on the necessity of letting go. Predominately, I am speaking about this mental surrender, but it also helps to keep this in mind when dealing with one’s material goods. With the purchase of the house and a change in my financial circumstances, I found myself looking to the contents of my wardrobe to sustain me. I am very grateful that I have been able to sell some of my clothes and shoes, and as I delved into this clear out, I was able to look at the items with a clearer eye. I asked myself, Is this still serving me?’ or ‘Would I purchase this today?’ If the answer was no, I offered it up.

Slowly, that miracle – a change in perspective – has come to me, reminding me of how greedy I have been in the past. I have collected a large number of clothes in the past by sheer force of will. Sometimes, there was not even any joy in the purchases, just a defence against this pervasive feeling of lack, which always made its way back into my life no matter how decadent the purchase had been.

Therefore, I now wish to express my gratitude for everything I have, and thank the universe for anything I might get in return for the things which are no longer serving me. May I put it to good use.

Today’s Tarot Reading: Death, The Moon, The Chariot

And so I began today’s reading as per usual: Dear Tarot, please help me to clear my mind and guide my path. The cards today were particularly resonant.

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Deck used: The Original Rider Waite Tarot DeckThe Original Rider Waite; journal found Mother of Pearl Journal (Diary, Notebook)here.

I have drawn three cards – Death (this one leapt out of the deck as opposed to being drawn), The Moon and The Chariot. All cards of the Major Arcana, which hints at some pretty big stuff going down.

So, in Death, we see impartial endings and beginnings. As this is in the ‘past’ position, this could be a comment on my recent change in work circumstances. The concept of death itself is also linked to the next life. Perhaps it is a reminder to let go of things which no longer serve me in this life as they did in my previous life; a sort of ‘you can’t take it with you’ on the present plane. The fact that this card was a leaper indicates to me that its message was vital and needs to be regarded as important.

One thing that’s striking here is the echoing of the towers in the background of Death and the mid-ground of The Moon. The towers seem to flank the path we take in both instances, though one side is more aligned with wildness than the other (i.e., the right side is represented by the wolf, the left by the dog). The tongues of fire which rain down on the scene are represented by the Hebrew letter Yod, which can mean both 10 and iodine (iodine, incidentally, has an atomic number of 53; 5+3=8, and 8+10=18, the number of the card itself). This is a psychological card, reminding us that things are rarely clear when we are working in low lighting. Shadows and anxiety are great at this time. However, there is a path through the card – intuition and faith are required to follow it through the darkness.

This leads us to the last card, The Chariot. In this card, the driver has turned away from civilisation (presumably passing through the aforementioned towers to do so) to pursue his own path. Again, duality is present, echoed from The Moon. Yet, this driving force does not need to rely on the driver’s physical strength. Instead, he relies on inspiration and willpower – the wand from The Magician is present here, if a bit larger than before (oo-er). Therefore, that initial lightning strike starts our progress, but willpower keeps it going.

So, I am interpreting the reading thus: what came before was a sudden change in lifestyle, leaving me to reevaluate my possessions and way of life. This process has thrown me into a darkened state of anxiety and confusion. Intuition and faith must now be relied upon to keep to the necessary path. In things to come, the path leads us through the realm of material goods and out the other side, relying on willpower and inspiration to see us through to the end.

Overall, it is a positive reading. Here, I am reminded of Picasso’s advice: ‘Inspiration exists, but it has to find you working.’ This is simply a reminder to keep on my intellectual pursuits, past the materialistic delights of fashion so that I might come to rely on my intuition and inner strength, even with the wolves howl and creepy crawlies emerge from the depths of my subconscious. In this dimly lit time, it is necessary to remember that a golden time is up ahead, where I will be moving fearlessly along.

Thank you, Tarot.

Today’s Tarot Reading: Two of Swords, Two of Cups, Knight of Cups

I read my tarot readings as I would a story, from past to present. This follows the journey of the Fool, of course, but also the querent. Today, this is me, of course.

Dear Tarot, please show me what I need to know today. The cards I have drawn are all minors today – Two of Swords, Two of Cups and Knight of Cups. From the outset, we can see that we’re moving from areas of intellect to areas of intuition with the change of suit.

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Deck used: The Original Rider Waite Tarot DeckOriginal Rider Waite; Lovebirds Cake TopperCake topper from our wedding.

To me, this says that in the past, I was deliberately blindfolded and torn with regards to my true course, attempting to use intellect only to solve this. Obstacles (to true thought) are present in this card, but they can be navigated skilfully. Wayne Dyer writes that there is no sin, but rather obstacles to living truthfully. Previously, it appears that I was torn between two ways of thinking, not wishing to confront either double-edged sword. Wielding these forces of power left me confused and torn, and so I crossed my wrists as if dead in this capacity, hoping that the problem would go away. It did not. Instead, a waxing moon loomed, reminding me that something new was growing, if only I could make a move and see it.

In the Present slot, our dark-haired protagonist has moved inland. She wears a laurel wreath, reminiscent of the Greek status symbol. Status, here, can be equated with internal acceptance and love for one’s self, as that is one of the most difficult traits to attain. It is only in this state that self love and respect that one can truly hand over a cup of love to someone else. This card speaks of my own inner journey, bringing me from a material mindset to one of free giving. Additionally, the overall structure of the card echoes the Two of Swords, implying that a change in perspective is all that is needed to reach this place of fullness. The last thing that I will touch on here is the Caduceus of Hermes, which is a symbol of commerce and of The Messenger. It seems to state that I am, at present, cultivating my message as I share my joy privately. Its shape also reminds me of two entwined souls, wrapping around the supporting base of faith.

In the Future position, we have the Knight of Cups, taking his cup and carrying it to another land, this time a barren one with a skinny stream running through it. The court cards are often indicative of the self, and I feel that this resonates here. Additionally, he is also clearly a messenger – the wings of Hermes are again present on his heels and helmet. he moves calmly and deliberately, coming in peace to serve. His cloak is covered in fish, representing creativity. This card follows on from the Page of Cups (consecutively), where the journeyer sees the spontaneous appearance of this inspiration. Now, he is clothed in it. However, this embodiment of creativity reminds us that great ideas without action are meaningless. Thus, he moves forward into a dry place that needs his…erm, cup. (Perhaps it runneth over? Shut up, brain!)

Thus, the interpretation here, as it reads to me, is: a time of indecision brought forward a time of growing confidence and immaterial progress. This will lead me to a personal distribution of the knowledge I have gained, distilling it into a concoction which will be easily understood by those who need it.